ALL

Due to weather and then illness, I’ve been at home with my children continuously for the last several days. My preschool-aged son received a few toys for Christmas that I squirreled away for a “rainy day.” Yet another February ice day in Texas gave us the perfect opportunity to dive into these indoor activities.

As we were using a plastic drill and screwdriver to assemble a trio of dinosaurs, I reflected on how much fun I was having. “I would never have been given a toy like this as a child - because I'm a girl. What a shame,” I thought to myself.

This led me to ponder the familiar phrases I’ve heard many times as a mother and as a teacher - “All girl” and “All boy."

What do these phrases even mean? Many, many times, friends and family members have remarked that my son is “all boy” in response to his active, dirt-loving spirit. Never once has anyone said my daughter is “all girl,” perhaps due to her atypical height and penchant for comfortable clothing. Does this make her less of a girl, not “all”? Absolutely not. Does my enjoyment of assembling plastic dinosaurs with a drill make me less of a girl, less of a woman? Also in the course of our passing the time indoors did my son and I play with my daughter’s old dolls and dollhouse. He pretended to cook for Batman in the kitchen, later making his Barbie doll swim and splash in the blue plastic pool. Does this make him less of a boy? What an absurd question.

Words matter. Some of our student populations are being targeted and made to feel less than, other. We as complex beings are never just one thing, never “all” one thing or another, as if these polarized options are the only way to be. I cherish my children for the multifaceted humans they are and vow not to use these phrases.